Dear New NICU Mom

First published July 2013
Updated January 2026

When I started working at Nationwide Children's Hospital sixteen years ago, I never expected to have to use the services we offered. But in 2013 when my daughter Cami was born 15 weeks early weighing only 1lb. 7 oz., a long hospital stay became a reality.

At 24 days old, my little girl developed necrotizing enterocolitis and was transferred in the middle of the night to Nationwide Children’s. It was at that moment that I became eternally grateful to have a top neonatology department so close to home. It’s hard to feel like a mom when your baby is in an isolette, when her primary caregivers are not mom and dad but rather doctors and nurses. It's hard to feel like a mom when simply holding your child requires the assistance of at least two people to get her out of her isolette, making sure not to tangle her leads, PICC line and CPAP.

I’m grateful my daughter was born in a time when modern medicine made the chances of her survival high and when being a preemie didn’t necessarily mean long term physical and developmental difficulties. I’m grateful for the many milestones we jumped over while in the NICU, but mostly I am grateful for all of the little things I was able to do with her that made me feel like a mom in those early days.

When Cami was less than a week old, one of my nurses asked if I wanted to change her diaper. She looked so tiny and fragile, in a diaper that looked like it could fit a doll but had to be folded over to fit her tiny frame. I couldn’t believe it was something they would let me do, but I have to say I was never so excited to change a poopy diaper. I suddenly felt like there was something I could do for my child, a way that I could take care of her.

Over the next few weeks, I started asking more and more questions and finding out what I could do during her care. We settled into a nice little routine. I wiped her eyes and I cleaned out her mouth. I gave her baths and changed her diapers. I lifted her up so she could be weighed each night and held her little hands while her nurse suctioned out her nose and mouth (she hated the suctioning, so I left that one to the nurses!) I gave her a binky if she cried and if she pulled her CPAP out of her nose, I knew exactly what to do to fix it.

Once, while I was in the process of changing her diaper, Cami peed all over me and all over her bed. It was such a normal parent/baby interaction, and it didn’t upset me that I’d have to change her bedding and wipe her off again. It made me happy that even though she was in an isolette, even though she’d be almost four months old before I could take her home with me, I still got to experience a lot of the things a new mom should. 

Cami eventually moved from an isolette to a crib. She started taking bottle feeds. She went from CPAP to a nasal cannula. All of these things made taking care of her so much easier. I was able to do so much for my little girl despite our circumstances.

Bonding with your baby is so critical at this point in their life; I want to encourage every mom and dad with a preemie to ask questions and get involved. I know their size can seem scary at first, but if I could successfully change a diaper on a feisty, squirming 1 lb. 7 oz little girl – I know that you can, too! I’m happy both my husband and I were still able to care for Cami like any other baby – we just needed a little extra help getting her home!